34

A week and a half ago was my birthday.
That Sunday morning, my dad in law asked, "Well, you've made it around 34 times, how do you feel?"

My answer?
I feel pretty good.

The day didn't really pan out the way I had hoped, we were packing up the house in a last ditch effort to get it done. I had visions that I could kick back and hang out with my little family. I pouted for a little while in the morning and then decided to just suck it up and make the best of it- I did get to give my husband grief all day about having to lift heavy boxes and get paper cuts. And I made sure to tease him about how big he owes me for having to move on my special day.



We wound up going out for a really nice date that night, thanks to my sis-in-law for watching the kids!
I also made up for it by making sure to celebrate all week long. Dinner at my mom's house one night, drinks and eats with my girlfriends another spread out the celebration and made it all the more special.

This year has been a hard one. I have felt older this year. Mostly emotionally older. The stress of all that has happened can wear on a girl. I have realized the weight of being an adult, we have made some very big kid decisions over the past 12 months that have made me grow and stretch and reach in deep for things inside that I didn't know I had.

growth isnt' always comfortable, change isn't easy.

But both are a part of life that are guaranteed to happen. As I come out on the other side of the tunnel I realize that I am stronger than I knew, and that is a huge gift.

I have also realized the joy of being a kid again. I can't tell you how much I have looked to my babies for laughter and comic relief on a hard, hard day. Watching them discover, learn and grow helps me remember to slow down, to enjoy and to not take it all so serious.

As I look back over the year, at my goals, I feel pretty proud to say I checked many of my wishes off the list. Some of the wishes were granted in ways I never could have imagined, some snuck up on me as part of everyday life, so were more lessons than wishes, but you always have to be careful what you wish for, right?

Some were lucky and others sweet friends made possible.

I like having a list, I like that I can look back and see where I made huge leaps, tiny steps and where I want to try again this coming year.
I plan on working up a list in the next few weeks, sort of a birthday/new year plan, if you will.
I think this year is going to rock, in the best possible way.