7.09.2010

7:52

I don't always realize the faces I make. How much I wear my heart on my sleeve, or really my heart in my expressions. Things have been good lately, (a little adjustment here and there with work and furlough days and the like) but there is still a bit of my gypsy self that longs to be else where. that never saw the life I have (that I do love) coming and wonders how the heck it all fell into place. I don't really know what I thought adulthood would bring- did any of us?
I often think I want to be on the go, hopping from place to place- but in reality I love a routine, the quite ease of knowing what my next step will be. When we are away from home I get a little antsy and flustered and don't even realize it until we are back home again and the regular rhythm sets back into place
- wake up when the boy walks into the room carrying all of his 'blankies' and maybe wearing his hat, snuggle for a few minutes, head downstairs, make coffee and milka, let Cloe girl out for her morning potty, get lunches going, get breakfast going, hear Daddy-O make his way to the master bath upstairs and then down the hall into the kitchen, sip coffee and eat with my guys, head upstairs to either dress the boy or hop in the shower....
I am sure a new rhythm would occur should we change the way we live, sell the house, make that jump to wander around and explore the country (a recent dream I have, but not sure how we would make it all work).
But would I still be looking, longingly out the window for something else? What am I looking for and can doing something 'unconventional' really bring to light what it is I am after?
52weeks7a

6 comments:

  1. Oh, this is so good. Love your lovely selfies and I certainly can relate to your daydreams right now.
    As soon as summer arrives, I find myself dreaming of hitting the road for a month or two. How I could make it happen, I'm not sure (aside from getting a teaching credential!). Let me know if you find a way!

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  2. Love the self pictures, and love this post. I was just thinking this yesterday while taking a drive by myself. You put it into words beautifully.

    It will be interesting to see how the routine changes with the new babe. Have a good weekend!

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  3. such a heart expanding post, nessie. i know that feeling, too. remember that a lot comes up right before giving birth, and treat your decisions in that light... you know how they say not to cut your hair while pregnant or just after giving birth? i think the same applies to huge life shifts. not a NO, just a more thoughtful considering.

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  4. I wonder about that too :)

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  5. I've been having similar thoughts about doing something "unconventional," and doubts about where I want to go from here. The mister has been having them too. But I think Cate has some extremely wise words.

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  6. Thank you ladies for your thoughtful and amazing responces to this post. I have more to say on the flickr posting of this shot too- and was pretty amazed at the fact that I am not alone in this wanderlust conundrom.

    We aren't making any big decisions right now- unless forced (by our work place, ie. layed off). I think my upcoming vacation will have a good effect on my mind/sould and what not.
    xo all!

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