5.12.2011

frozen in time


When I see an old car like this I get nostalgic. I wonder where it has gone, what adventures it has been on and what roads it has traveled. I wonder what conversations it has heard, what songs blared on the radio and if there was ever a bucket of paint that was spilled in the backseat. (Yeah, that happened to my car once. An entire gallon of paint tipped and spilled everywhere as I headed home from the Depot). I wonder if it had giggling children bouncing around in the backseat or a shaggy dog hanging from the window with a smile on its face.
Do you think the car knows it's old? Or does it feel fresh, new and special because someone has taken the time to see the beauty in its curves, shiny face and sweet hub caps? Obviously, someone doesn't mind that they have to crank the windows up and down. Or the fact that they actually have to use a key to unlock the doors.
I wonder these things, as I sit filling out job applications and writing cover letters. As I search for a possible new career, I feel frozen in time. I am frozen in fear of being out of date and 'vintage' in skills and abilities.
But, maybe someone will see what I see in this 'car'. If I take the time to buff and shine my resume and really see what I know and have learned in the past 10 years. I can be just like this car if given the chance. I might just feel new and fresh at a different desk, in a new city.
Maybe that fresh start, just like new orange paint, (ironically named, "bitter sweet") will be just what I need to feel awesome again.
Part of me is so comfortable in the place I am at right now. Even though I am not always challenged or happy, I know what my duties and what is expected of me during the year. But the other part of me is excited and grateful for the push of a possible layoff. It is forcing me to look into other opportunities that I otherwise wouldn't have given a second glance. It is forcing me to evaluate myself and my skills and put down on paper what I know.
I am sure there will be some bugs splattered on the windshield as I head down this new road. If I can get past the fear driving stick shift again, grinding the gears as I move from reverse to first gear; I know I will love the feeling of letting my hand hang out the window and pressing my foot firmly on the gas, as I drive towards a new adventure.
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Speaking of adventures, we just returned from one that involved sand, ocean mist and lots of giggles. Stay tuned...

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